Gregory Sare Landolt (gregoid) wrote,
Gregory Sare Landolt

  • Mood:

Trying to cheer everyone up

Bad moods and sickness seem to be running rampant right now. I'm no exception. I'm both sick and in a bad mood, but that is not stopping me from wanting to brighten up everyone's day. Here is something that might help.

    A physician claims these are actual comments from his patients made while he was performing colonoscopies:

  1. "Take it easy, Doc, you're boldly going where no man has gone before."

  2. "Find Amelia Earhart yet?"

  3. "Can you hear me NOW?"

  4. "Oh boy, that was sphincterrific!"

  5. "Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?"

  6. "You know, in Arkansas, we're now legally married."

  7. "Any sign of the trapped miners, Chief?"

  8. "You put your left hand in, you take your left hand out. You do the Hokey Pokey...."

  9. "Hey! Now I know how a Muppet feels!"

  10. "If your hand doesn't fit, you must acquit!"

  11. "Hey, Doc, let me know if you find my dignity."

  12. "You used to be an executive at Enron, didn't you?"

  13. "Could you write me a note for my wife, saying that my head is not, in fact, up there?"

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